Please note the following job opportunity conveniently located in downtown Toronto!
Wanted: One chief of staff. Position reports to an innovative maverick with an international reputation. If you want adventure and a new challenge every hour of the day, this job is for you! Learn new skills, like dodging cameras and planning parties for teenage athletes while building your reputation as a strategic forward-thinker. Must be comfortable in back stairwells, have a passion for football and be skeptical of rehabilitation of any kind. Those who don't appreciate the ease with which videos can be manipulated need not apply. Salary commensurate on ability to enable bad behaviour and avoid the obvious.
Apply - you can't af'FORD not to!